Happy New Year Everyone!

January the first is always such an interesting day, so full of promise and excitement…and an empty diary.

Every year I experience the same unspoken question: what will I fill this diary with?

So here we are…a new year and an empty diary…

I don’t make new years resolutions, but I do have hopes and expectations of myself, and these I embrace without demand, and without putting myself under any pressure.

I have entered 2011 slimmer, toned, with a better wardrobe, and (most importantly) with a greater understanding of who I am (although I know that this will evolve). At the beautiful age of 47 I came to finally know ME…in all my glory…and it was almost a surprise to meet the real me.

As a writer I expect myself to work harder this year…and so long as we don’t have another big earthquake and relentless aftershocks, I think I can manage that! I know that this is my ‘work’, and I know that the works that I write are not just a part of my journey, but will (hopefully) be a part of your journey. (All I need is a publisher who will say ‘Yes!).

I personally believe we should all use this new year to be greater people, to be more loving, kinder, compassionate, tolerant, understanding, to be greater human beings.

Figuring out who we are

To figure out who we are … we need to let go of all our preconceived notions, and to ignore everything society says.

To figure out who we are, we must stand naked before ourselves, and leg go of everything.

Sounds easy. It is anything but!

How many of the notions we have, about the world, society, and ourselves, are not truly ours? How many are the rules and creations of our society (and church)?

Do any of us truly know who we are?

As children we are taught how to behave, how to dress and how to eat, we are even taught what to wear and what to eat. We are told what is right and what is wrong. And then we start school and we are taught a set of values and rules, we are told what is important, we are taught a system of measuring ourselves against everyone else. We are taught a ‘worldy’ set of values, but we are not taught to learn who we are, to develop a deep understanding of ourselves.

We are not taught to learn about us. We are not encouraged to discover our own passion and taste, we are taught to embrace academia, we are taught to compete against everyone else.

I am not disparaging academia, I am disparaging that we don’t encourage the passion outside of this. I have met so many people who don’t know who they are, who have spent a lifetime trying to be what other people wanted them to be, trying to play a role. This is tragic! I have known women who are in their forties and they are the most magnificent women I have ever known, and yet they do not realise this for themselves, they see only their faults. They were never encouraged (taught!) to discover who they are, to learn how positive values and behaviours may resonate through them and make them feel good or bad, they were not taught that all our passions have value and have a place in this world, and that our passions are our life guidance.

Let me make it clear: we were not all born to be academic geniuses. If we were this would be a black and white world without art, music, sculpture, fashion, makeup, stories, poetry, movies, beautiful gardens, without dancing….and without passion! I don’t want to live in such a world! The reason we all do have such different passions is because these passions and loves make the world!

Every passion is a stroke of colour in the masterpiece of life on Earth!

Don’t let society tell you who you are. And when it comes to the taboo of sexuality, if you are a woman attracted to women, then embrace that about yourself. If you are a woman attracted to both men and women, then embrace that about yourself. If you are a woman attracted to men only, embrace that. Love is what is important, not the sex of the person you feel that love for. To deny love, is to deny a part of yourself, to be dishonest. I am not saying you need to act on it, but at least you can be honest and say ‘yes I do love this person, and I cherish that this love is in my life, but I will not act on it.’ You don’t need to act on everything, but it is often better to acknowledge the existence of your feelings, rather than pretend they do not exist.

If you love roses, but not carnations, embrace that about yourself. If you like to dance around the house, embrace that and dance around the house! If you love to cook, embrace that! If you love to garden, embrace that! If you like dressing sexy because your women friends always tell you how great you look—even though your boyfriend never tells you—then dress sexier for them! (Face it, women ‘get’ women, and men may never fully understand us! It is just the way it is!) Don’t ever feel that your passion has lesser value than anyone else’s passion. Just because one man has a passion for surgery on the human body, and another has a passion for baking, neither is of lesser or greater importance than the other.

Learn who you are, what you love, what fires your passions, how you feel about all the people in your life, how you feel about music. Discover what sets you alight!!! As you make these discoveries you will change, you will find where the joy is, you will feel it burning through you, you will discover your own innate sense of style, (and not follow what everyone else is wearing!). You will evolve. And you will be living the most honest life possible.

Let go of everything, and discover who you are…it will be the most fascinating, and most joyous, passion filled journey you will ever take!

Friendship

I don’t look at friendships as in ‘what can I get out of this?’ I look at friendships as in ‘what can I give?’

The most rewarding bonds I have with people are the ones where we both contribute to the friendship.

There are, of course, those relationships that are (to put it bluntly) selfish, where the other person is only every after something, be it someone to explain their life and help them, or someone to rant on and on to about their life. But they don’t give, emotionally, to the relationship.

As much as we might want to talk on and on about our life, our woes, and to complain endlessly about everything…the less we take time to listen. And if we are always focussing the conversation on ourselves, then that is the only area that gets explored—and we stay within the small confines of that conversation.

The greatest friend ships you will ever have are the ones where both sides want to give to the relationship, to help, to listen, to support, affirm, embrace, and to just unconditionally love and accept the other person…but also be the one to say ‘actually, I think you’re just being a pratt.’

For me, life is about people. It’s all about people and relationships. And if I have reached the end of my lifetime and not truly loved … then I have wasted a vast opportunity. And so, when it is one of those beautiful friendships … I give it all I have to give, all the love in my heart. To do otherwise is to cheat both my friend and myself. I won’t do that.

Making the changes

I have noticed that a lot of people are being pushed to make changes in their life.

This is not a new thing, it is simply that the intensity has kicked up a few notches.

Why?

Because many people were pushed years ago to start making these changes, and they didn’t. They continued with the same way of living, the same negative patterns and behaviours. They saw no need to change, and so they didn’t.

The drawback of this is: if they have started paying more attention to those little nudges to change, they would have completed the process of change by now. But they didn’t, and so it is crunch time. What could have been easy of the could of years, not has to be completed in months. Why? Because that is what the Universe is pushing!

And that is why people are having such a rough time. Life seems harder, things are more ‘unfair’…but the fact is, it they/we had listened, it would not be this tough.

Pay attention to what needs to change in your life. Start the process. It will be a lost easier in the long run.

And if life is tough…just take it one step at a time, and keep going, keep pushing yourself to make the changes. It is all for a reason, even if we cannot see what that reason is yet.

The world is changing...and it's not something we can stop.

Time to dive back in to writing

I have not updated this blog for a while. Why? Because I can’t seem to relax enough to let the writing flow. So, I decided, maybe the flow is found within the process of the writing itself…

Aftershocks continue. Most of them are in the 3s (magnitude) and we barely feel them. Those in the 4s give us a bit of a jolt, and a bit of a reminder that the aftershocks may go on for months. The reminders serve to keep us slightly on edge.

Whilst our house is fine, we do have cracks along the cement between the concrete blocks. These move every time there is a decent sized aftershock. We decided yesterday that they are our very own tectonic plates! The thing is…these areas (3 of them plus a crack part way down each side of the chimney) are weaker areas, and if we get an aftershock in the 5s or higher…well, I am not sure what might happen. This is the worry that lays at the back of the mind. And it has been getting in the way when I try to write!

...

I was thinking about the way we live our lives, the focus we apply to our days. How often do we think too much about what we don’t have, and not enough (if at all) about what we do have?

I don’t dispute that we need money…just as I hope you will not dispute that we need to be happy in life. If I had to live in miserable worry about lack of money, every day of my life…I would rather not live at all. I do not believe that we are here, on Earth, for material gain. I believe we are here for spiritual gain. Yes, there is a necessity for money, and I respect that, but it is not the purpose of our life, it is a means.

If we don’t celebrate life … what’s the point?
If we don’t cherish the people in our life … what’s the point?
If we don’t laugh every day … what’s the point?

It’s time to examine the way we live in every hour of every day … and it’s time we made better choices!

One week after the big earthquake

As I wrote this we were hit by a 4.5 magnitude aftershock.The are continuing, but are lesser in frequency and magnitude.

The 'A' marks where that 4.5 just hit

What has become a new fascination for many is where the aftershocks are coming from. It is not the same location, but rather along what was, until 4.35 a.m. 4^th Sep, an unknown fault line. Now the aftershocks are making clear where that line is, and it is aimed right at Christchurch.

Was there any evidence of such a fault line prior to the earthquake? No. Canterbury Plains are just that: plains. Flat as a pancake! Head west and you will reach the Southern Alps, which is a known and dramatically obvious fault line, but where Saturday’s big one hit, there was absolutely no indication of the existence of a fault line.

This leads to the inevitable and unanswerable question: what other fault lines lie beneath Canterbury, in indeed any other city/land for that matter? Until some magical technology arises that can detect such things, we will only know them when they tell us they are there…generally in the language of an earthquake!

The image below, on the left, is part of the historic arts center, which was the city's first university. There have been areas of damage to these wonderful buildings, but this one intrigued me most. Just was was it that fell off and made the impression in the grass?

Five days after the Earthquake

Five days after the earthquake and we have finally had a decent sleep. Perhaps it was simply exhaustion that led many of us to sleep through the minor aftershocks. I would be happy if I felt fully rested, but like many, I still feel exhausted.

As more pictures are shown in the news we see more and more of the damage.

A railway line not supposed to look like this! Up and down, left to right...and as dreadful as it is to look at, I cannot help but wonder what it would have looked like as it happened? The macabre side of human nature wants to ask for a replay on television.

Houses that had looked okay on Tuesday, with intact chimneys, were not looking as good after yesterday's 5.1 magnitude aftershock. (Some people are saying it was a completely different earthquake and not an aftershock, becuase it was a different fault, one actually near Diamond Harbour.) Whatever you want to call it, further damage happened. Our own chimney which had a small crack down the right side, now has a slightly bigger crack there and a new crack down the left side. Am I worried a bigger aftershock will topple the chimney? Yes, I am, but at the moment the cracks are only a few millimeters wide. We will just take things one day at a time...or perhaps more correctly would be to say 'one aftershock at a time'.

As I said, chimneys continue to be an issue for many houses. Builders, bricklayers and roofers are working as hard as they can to get these dangerous chimneys down as safely as possible.

But when the aftershock hits, and you really really want the chimney to topple the other way ... sometimes it just comes right through your house, leaving a massive hole in the roof. Fortunately this is not the norm.

It is time to appreciate our builders as the vital components to recovery that they are. Tradesmen are the men we most want to see walking up the driveway, tool belt swinging.

The Christchurch Earthquake. A sleeping fault line.

The fault line responsible for the 7.1 magnitude earthquake on Saturday morning, had laid, sleeping for at least 16,000 years. This was an unknown fault line.

Civil defence has been practising for an earthquake, rehearsing what they would need to do. But they were practising for an earthquake expected from the known southern alp fault line. No one expected this earthquake.

We are, of course, now asking ourselves two questions, which no one is going to be able to answer.
1.Has Saturday’s earthquake taken the pressure off the southern alp fault line somehow?
2.Or are we still to expect that, one day, that southern alp fault line will rupture into a 8 or 9 magnitude earthquake?

Aftershocks continue.

We are already living in fear of the anticipated 6 magnitude aftershock. Is ‘living in fear’ an exaggeration? Sadly, no.

Between 9.46 am Monday morning and 8.24 am Tuesday morning (today) there were 30 aftershocks. The worst:
11.24 p.m. 5.2 magnitude ( shook houses badly, and caused a great deal of fear)
11.38 p.m. 4.0 magnitude (made the heart leap a bit)
11.40 p.m. 5.4 magnitude (set the heat thumping, the adrenalin pumping)
A night like that was enough to frighten everyone. When we thought things might be beginning to settle down, suddenly the aftershocks were worse than they had been the night before.

As much as we want to call off the party and all go home and get back to ‘normal life’…it’s not going to happen. Not for a while.

GNS believe that the quake had the strongest ground-shaking ever recorded in an earthquake in New Zealand. Whilst Cantabrians are competitive people, there are some things we would rather not lead the field in!

History.

Hopefully we cannot look to history for what to expect. Euan Smith, a Geophysics professor at Victoria University, said:

"In 1929 there occurred, in west Canterbury, a magnitude 7 earthquake which turned out to be the first of a series of seven major, magnitude greater than 7, earthquakes over the next 13 years. The series included the second and third largest earthquakes in European times.

"It is improbable that this occurrence of such large earthquakes in rapid succession was coincidental. There is no reason to think that such a series could not happen again."

Improbable? A week ago experts would likely have said a magnitude 7.1 earthquake in Canterbury was improbable. And yet, here we are…

500 buildings destroyed

Update: 500 buildings have been destroyed, 90 of them in the city center.

90 of power is back on in Christchurch.

Today (Sunday 5th Sept) we are expecting gale force winds, and likely rain and sleet. With many rooves damaged, chimneys down, there will be people who have wind blowing through their houses, and when the rain hits....there are going to be some serious problems for those people.

Overall, the people of Christchurch have been brilliant. Calm, supportive and coping well.

Throughout last night there were many small aftershocks. Knowing that we could be hit by an aftershock of magnitude 6, each aftershock woke me (as I am sure it did everyone else) and the heart rate increased and the adrenaline pumped. It was an unsettling night.

Cracks in paths can be minor or major, but are certainly common! There are many cracks like the one in the picture to the right, but fortunately not in our immediate block! The dog looks as bemused as the humans.

There is going to be some massive work ahead for road workers. It would be, I imagine, a task that must surely seem insurmountable. And it must be done quickly.

For the many houses with fallen chimneys and damaged rooves, they will be needing repairs as fast as they can get them. It is fortunate that we are out of winter, but it is un-fortunate that spring is an unpredictable season where we can get all four seasons in the one day.

My daughter's boyfriend's family suffered cracks through the exterior of their house as we did, and also in the interior, but nothing structural. It helps that he is a builder!! I would imagine he is going to be one of many people with a lot of work coming in. Roofies and builders are going to be the sought after people, the most worshipped men in town!!! Tradesmen are the unsung heroes of our workforce.

Chablias anyone?

The supermarkets, as you can imagine, would have had a massive mess to clean up.

Think of the supermarket you shop in, and consider how much would fall in an earthquake, imagine the mess, the smashed jars and bottles.

The picture to the left is the wine aisle...not a pretty sight.

However, it is, I am sure, an example of what has happened to every supermarket in Christchurch. There is simply no way, in an earthquake as violet as the one we experienced at 4.35 a.m. yesterday morning, that any shop could have got away unscathed.

Bottles of wine, jars of anything you can imagine, will all have fallen and smashed. What a massive clean up staff with have faced. But what seems to have happened everywhere is, the employees turned up, regardless of whether they were scheduled to work or not, and they just got down to work.

People have done what needed to be done, to help. They have been unselfish.

And, dear readers...I just had to share this with you. Because we have been asked to conserve water, some people have set up a new toilet.

Don't you just love Kiwi ingenuity!!

Apparently the dust from your vacuum cleaner can be good at soaking up the liquid...and you can throw in some garden soil to cover up the solids....yes, I know, not really something we want to talk about!

A 4.2 magnitude aftershock hit as I was writing this entry, and gave me a hell of a fright.

It is still so hard to believe all of this has happened. I am still amazed that our house is standing after the violence of the quake.

As one person said in a facebook entry: Christchurch really does rock and roll!!

Earthquake in Christchurch, New Zealand

4.30 a.m., I think I had probably been asleep for all of an hour and half, when massive shaking woke me up. It felt like someone grabbed the house and started shaking and didn't stop!

I flipped straight into :
Q. WHAT?
A. Earthquake?
Q. How bad?
A. F****** BAD!!!!
Q. Potential damage to house?
A. Stuff probably falling off the outside. (Seriously, I did not see HOW the house could survive unscathed.)
Q. Family?
A. I shouted for everyone to "Get in a doorway!!" (forget getting under a dining table, we were upstairs, it was pitch black and the power was out) and I shouted it four times becuase daughter and boyfriend were downstairs.

I have never felt anything like it. Nor have I ever heard such a sound, the rumbling/roaring of the earthquake and the sounds of a house in distress.

Searching round the floor for my torch, which had rolled off the bedside drawers, I rushed downstairs to check on my daughter and her boyfriend, and had no sooner opened the door than an aftershock (of 5.2) hits! We were ALL freaked, and we were all scared!

We all moved to the kitchen, lit some candles, turned off the torches, to conserve battery power, and then managed to find a radio (the only radio we had was on my husband's Nokia cell phone!) that was when we heard it was a 7.4 magnitude earthquake. (Later the 7.4 was downgraded to a 7.1.)

The Earthquake was centered just over 30 kilometers away and was about 10 kilometers deep. The area worst hit was probably the central business district.

Falling bricks damaged a number of cars. The Daily Bagel was one of a row of shops whose entire front facade just fell off!

A state of emergency has been declared in the central business district to give the civil defense people the power to keep people out of the city. Nosy people who just want to look at the damage, and get in the way, as well as risking their safety. There are a number of unstable buildings that could topple onto a passer-by.

We have areas of this kind of damage to the exterior.

We personally have some cracks in the exterior concrete blocks of the house, but nothing major. I was really amazed that we did not have stuff falling off the house...and just goes to show how sturdy this house is! Some neighbors had chimneys that fell down and smashed the roof. Two people were seriously injured, one by a falling chimney, and another by fall glass. Aside from those two, other injuries have been reasonably minor (as far as we know).

Fallen chimneys from the block we live on.

On a night with a filthy cold frost we were now without power. No way to heat the house or any water for a coffee/tea. Bundled up, we listened the news reports.

It was likely that we would not know when the power would come on until an announcement was made somewhere round 11 a.m. It was hopeful that we would have power back on by the end of the day. 

This is just round the block we live in.

There are cracks in many roads, and footpaths. Some deep enough to stand in (so I heard on the radio).

And what is the thing you really really want to do at a time like that? UPDATE YOUR BLOG!!! Post on facebook!!! But with no power we had no broadband router, hence no internet.

The power came on 7 hours later. Finally some heat and a cup of tea! As far as the water system goes, the Mayor has advised that the water is going to be turned off. I don't know if this is so they can repair, or investigate. I have filled bottles etc so that we have a supply to last us. Thank goodness I did the grocery shopping yesterday!

My sister and her family are fine. My Dad, thank goodness, was in hospital, where he has been for two weeks with an infection inside his knee. He said the quake scared the crap out of him and he thought it was the end of the world! Thank goodness he was in a place where he was safe and where they had power and heat. It was the first time I was glad he was in hospital!

It was one hell of a way to wake up...and at the back of your mind you are saying to yourself, silently, "This can't be happening.

The road is a foot lower than the bridge

Christchurch was very lucky. It could have been so much worse. And if this is the big earthquake that we have all been waiting for in this city...then we got off lightly.

Sweet notes

My daughter is a design and art student, and had been working on an assignment on raw sugar.

When I got home from buying the groceries (a necessary task as there was nothing in the house to eat!) she had left me a note...in the raw sugar!

random thoughts...: What a weekend!

random thoughts...: What a weekend!: "You know the weekends I love? The ones where the jobs get done! I promised my sister four raised gardens for her birthday, and finally we g..."

What a weekend!

You know the weekends I love? The ones where the jobs get done!

I promised my sister four raised gardens for her birthday, and finally we got a weekend of good weather.
I spent nearly all day Saturday sawing wood and drilling...and by days end my back was so sore, and tennis elbow was flaring in both elbows. BUT, it was a job I had been wanting to get done, so was feeling pretty satisfied.

I am doing what I can to encourage my sister to grow some vegetables and herbs! We have both long held an interest in good health and diet, so I am just doing what I can to help!

I may get some extra seedlings going come spring and take some out for her. I think the gardens are a good height, and easy to get at from all sides, so should make vegetable gardening a pleasure! Can you think of anything better than going out into the garden and eating a fresh strawberry, guava, or tomato, straight from the plant? The energy of the food is at its very best!

The other jobs that I had wanted to get done was to move the Feijoas and Chilean Guavas from sitting on top of the soil, to planted IN the soild!

I had -- after the first picture was taken -- bought another Chilean Guava! This garden is the garden for growing fruit! Must admit, those are voilets planted along the front, but my argument is: they will attract the bees!

We do actually have a Feijoa already...but when you like Feijoas (as out whole family does) then one tree is simply never enough! Feijoas have always been a treat...now they will be a feast!

Getting out in the fresh air and doing some gardening, is just as much about exercise and fresh air as it is about growing healthy organic food. We spend so long indoors in winter, that come spring and summer I want to be outdoors in  my gardens. I never used to be much of a gardener, but it's a bit addictive!

I also finally put the Compact Stella Cherry in the pot, and that job was another that had been waiting for me.

Why a cherry? Why in a pot? A friend of mine, a gorgeous girl called Debbie, told me about her cherry tree in a pot and the six kilos of fruit she got off it last season. I admit that I will need to learn how to keep it pruned properly, but I have a gardener friend who can help me with that.

It has been a busy, tiring weekend ... and I am now rewarding myself with a large mug of tea and a sit down while I watch the rugby match between the Wallabies and the Springboks!

We Expect Too Much of Each Other

You don't see this man complain that he doesn't have a car.

In my heart, I know that there is more beyond what I see than I could possibly imagine.

Sometimes I get so caught up in the mundane day-to-day struggle of life, and of trying to be what I think other people expect me to be, that I do not allow myself to BE who I am.

I am under no obligation to grieve for the economy, to grieve for the loss of another’s opportunities (that may never have been for their highest good anyway), to grieve for the hurtful comments made by another adult, to grieve for their lack of enjoyment of life.

I am under no obligation to grieve for you.

So, please, stop expecting me to. Stop getting angry with me because I do not grieve for what you feel you do not have in your life.

You have so much.

And yet you focus only on that which you do not have.

• I would rather celebrate having one dollar in my pocket than grieve for the fact that I do not have two dollars in my pocket.

• I would rather celebrate my simple small apartment, than grieve for the big seven bedroom house that I do not have.

• I would rather celebrate every second of the lives of my children, than ever ever grieve for how much it costs to raise them.

• I would rather eat soup and scones for dinner at home with my family, than grieve for the dinner I am not having in a fancy restaurant.

• I would rather celebrate the days I get to spend with my father and sister, than grieve at the months during which we live thousands of miles apart.

• I would rather marvel at the sunrise, than grieve over the pile of ironing that I could be tending to.

• I would rather celebrate that last piece of chocolate cake, than mourn that it is almost all gone.

• I would rather relish ever second that my friends can spend with me, than mourn that we don’t get to see each other enough.

• I would rather celebrate the heat of the day, than complain that it is too hot to go out.

• I would rather enjoy that cup of tea at the food-court up the road, than complain that the sweat is running down my back.

• I would rather walk on aching feet to the coffee shop to share cheesecake with my child, than say no and loose that special time together.

My life is what I make of it. My life is joyous, because I choose to see things through joyous eyes.

My life is abundant, because I choose to see the abundance in life.

We see what we look for. We find what we expect.

Change the self you show the world

Sometimes we need to pause and consider if what we are showing the world is truly representative of who we are now, in this moment?

Or is it representative of a past ‘us’?

As we grow and evolve—and I am talking about the spiritual path—we change. That which was once representative of who we were—our style of dressing, footwear, business cards, website design—is no longer accurate. It is time to take a look at who we are now, in this moment.

Who are you? What’s your style? Do the clothes you wear represent who you are? Does your website represent your personality and joy of life?

Is everything a bit too restrained? Too confined? Too non-descript?

Staying within a past description of you is like tying a weight around your ankles and then walking on. It holds you to that past. If you can let go of what represented you in the past and embrace what is representative of you now, then you can forge ahead unburdened.

We cannot pretend that we have not changed. We cannot continue to act in a way that is no longer who we are.

We have to live, fully and joyously, in this moment and every moment beyond.

Don’t bind yourself to something you have outgrown. Allow yourself to expand and grow and rejoice at the BEingness that you are.

Writers don't just WATCH movies

Last night I was watching the first part of the Phantom mini series, and I thought ‘sheesh, should I turn this off and do some re-editing?’ I sat there and thought about this and I realised that writers don’t watch movies, we study them!

As a writer I assessed the ongoing story, the character development, the interactions, the setting, the sensibility. I looked at what did and did not work, at what was done purely to freak out the viewers, at what could have been done differently, at what would have made the story line stronger.

Oh yes, I enjoyed the episode, but it was definitely not mindless entertainment. It was a time to sit and assess the workings of the story.

I’m not interested in movies that rely on special effects and have very little evident storyline, they are a waste of time. There is no excuse for any movie lacking a story line.

Good story. Whole characters. Relationships. Interactions. I want to see how the writer handled them, how real they were to him/her. You can always sense when the writer was not close to the characters, as there is a shallowness to the development.

So, next time I watch a movie or a miniseries will I feel guilty? No, I will call it what it is: study time!

All Blacks v Wallabies

Whilst lacking in the excitement and drama of the previous three All Blacks matches, I have to say that Saturday’s game was a good solid performance from the All Blacks.

They kept focused, and did not let up on the Wallabies for a second.

To their credit, the Wallabies gave a great effort, they never stopped trying to score, they had posession of the ball for much of the match...they just couldn't seem to convert that possession into goals.

In four matches of the Tri-Nations:

All Blacks v Springboks = All Blacks WIN

All Blacks v Springboks = All Blacks WIN

All Blacks v Wallabies = All Blacks WIN

All Blacks v Wallabies = All Blacks WIN

One of the greatest dangers in any rugby match is coming out slow. You have to come our hard and fast, full on, no letting up, attack attack attack…and that is exactly what the All Blacks have done in each match. It’s inspiring stuff to watch.

I’m a rugby fan. I love the total commitment of the game, the total body commitment.

And yet, it is a crazy game! Grab the ball and try to run through a line of burly players? Madness! But I tell you what, when someone makes it through, you are suddenly on the edge of your seat! And when a set piece goes perfectly to plan and a player dives over the line, the cheer is almost as involuntary as breathing!

Live with PASSION!

It is time to live with PASSION and PERSONALITY!!! To do anything less is to live life less fully!

Family, friends and society all demand things from us, behaviors, procedures, manners, interactions, tact, etc etc etc. But in trying to answer everyone else’s requirements/demands, we never really discover who we are.

And so, starting today, starting the moment I began to realize this: I will live with all the passion, personality and love that I am.

We are each unique, and were never meant to be replicas of a divine being, but rather us living as a divine being. Me, and all that I am, my sense of humor, my personality, my passions, all living as a divine being. It is all about how we live.

I have met many people who…to be honest…they live such a pale life, when there is such magnificent, colorful passion and joy just waiting to burst through. They are living in pastel, when the full pallet of color is available to them.

Look back at your life, and see (particularly for women) how you changed your behavior because you wanted to fit in, to be accepted, to be liked, to be respected, to be envied, to make people proud, to impress, to fit in with a partner’s friends and associates. You will see, time and time again, how you ‘played a role’. This is why so many of us don’t really know who we are.

The funny thing for me is…when I am writing I know exactly who my characters are, and when I am writing I know that that is who and what I am: a writer.

I have had a tendency to behave conservatively with other people, and that stops now. I went to dinner a few weeks ago, dressed up in my jeans, high heeled red boots, and black leather jacket, and I was just me in all my glory for the night. And you know what? It felt great. I talked to the people sitting around me and we all had a great time. I think it was a better night because I was being my passionate self and not the conservative ‘Mr X’s wife’.

So, here’s my suggestion. Let’s all start living with a whole lot more passion and personality. Stop hiding, stop being conservative.

My Dad and I often have the discussion of ‘characters’ and he (being born in 1929) worked with men who had survived WWII. Some of these men were real characters! They had been through something so brutal, but they knew what was important. Today’s corporate world and bosses are all about money and profit, and making themselves feel important. It’s power games, and they have never ever had to truly test themselves in battle. And don’t you dare talk to me of board room battles, because they are not battles. Compared to a war, to life and death struggles, they are petty arguments amongst power hungry people. That’s all.

People who have faced their mortality return home changed by that experience. Whilst we who have not faced our mortality are still buying into this plastic false, surface living life.

No more!!!

I’m tired of talking to people who are afraid to fully live. Let’s live, with passion and personality!! Don’t be afraid to be you.

Forget the pastel colors, forget the beige life. Let us live the full pallet of colors!!!